Business or Busy-ness... Which Are You?
It's a new year people and everyone is getting their LIFE right now! Prioritizing, vision boards (if you haven't already), making lists and checking them twice for 2017. YES! We are all getting it together to make it the best year ever right!... Ok so let's reflect again over 2016, shall we? (Take a moment of silence and really look back over the year for a good 60 sec.) Ask yourself these questions:
What could I have done differently?
Did I pray more? Less?
Were my priorities in order?
Did I accomplish any of my goals?
Were unimportant people/things put before my responsibilities?
Could I have spent more time off one thing to do another?
Was I a good steward of my time?
Now that you've painfully taken a trip down memory lane, were you really honest with yourself in your answers? If not, your 2017 will not be any better. You will repeat the same actions, habits, and disasters all over again. Some of us are really really really what we've heard from our parents or other parents to their kids... Hard-headed! I don't care how perfect some of you perfect people think you are, we have all had a time or several that we just wanted to do what we wanted to do regardless of the circumstances. Usually we know them up front, but we have to see for ourselves. You are what I call "experience-learners" and I have ZERO patience for those in my life. I've been through too much and overcome too many things to want to add to the list of disasters on a regular basis. Others were so busy doing things that wasted their time, that they don't know what to do and now feel like it is too late to get started. Some of us spent so much time meddling in other peoples affairs that we wasted time that we could have had catering to our dreams and goals. A lot of us were so stuck on social media that the house was a wreck, no dinner prepared, laundry still in piles and went to sleep that night tired but we had done nothing all day. For some, the most productive thing you did definitely was clock in that morning for work. After that, it was your finger that pulled a second shift once you got off and you can tell me every meme, death, drama episode, and so and so's business that she put all over Facebook for people to see. Last but not least, the infamous four letter word that kept us so busy and not handling any business of ours whatsoever, FEAR. It is like a marinade you put on your meat or poultry and some people let it marinade 10 min and some a lifetime. If you lay in it too long it will ruin you and you will never rise up and do what you've been created to do. Everything mentioned are things that kept you in busy-ness in 2016, but not handling your business. You were so so busy, but not "productive" to say the least.
1.0 Uncensored Moment
I had taken a break from my business after having my baby. After he was about 2 or 3 months old, I started getting feelings of needing to get back into everything. Over the next couple months, it got to where I was going to bed every night unfulfilled and feeling like I had no purpose even though I knew exactly what I was supposed to be doing. I started back on my business but I had not quite balanced the whole new mom, wife and work-from-home life and the older he got, the worse it was. It's NO joke working from home with a kid and a whole husband. Because they see you, they think you're available whenever and you have to say, "No hubbie, I'm working love. Can you give me an hour or so to get this done then I'm all yours" (kiss). At first, it was cute because he was still only a couple months old, but then I started getting that feeling on the inside of me, reminding me that I still had purpose outside of wife and mommy life. I was trying to stay busy doing a little bit of everything like a chicken with a head completely chopped off. I let more and more time go by and he wasn't getting any younger. I even had the nerve when people asked what have you been up to girl, to say, "Busy hunni! You already know just busy." Why do we say that so much when half the time, we really aren't and we have nothing to show for it! Because no one wants to really say, "I have no clue and I'm over it already. I need to find out because time is flying." What it is is that we are busy, but busy doing a whole lot of "stuff" and not anything "productive" or goal related to help push us in the direction in which we are striving for.
I woke up super early one morning (like 4am), determined to get answers, and went into my quiet time which is my time with God before my house wakes up. I laid it all out, my feelings, frustrations, needs, desires, even played the blame game. Once I was done, I sat there and I heard deep down on the inside of me, "Your priorities are out of order." I think my insides just caved in and I became so small. Right then, I knew exactly what that meant. I put things that were in 7th place in 3rd place, and 1st place in 4th place. We all know God is supposed to be in first place so you do the math and tell me how out of whack I had my life going at the time. No wonder why I was all over the place and not feeling accomplished of any thing when I laid my head down at night. Once I got that revelation, I got rid of all my excuses, even the valid ones. I started changing that the SAME DAY. By day 2, my husband's mood was different, motherhood was less frustrating, and my responsibilities became opportunities and not my duties. It affected him and I didn't even realize it. My unhappiness was being heard, felt, and established loud and clear. I saw where I could cut out time in my day to put towards my goals while still keeping my priorities in their rightful place. I cut out things like the 1-2 hour convo with my girlfriend or sisters each day that I thought I needed to have. I started answering my phone (via bluetooth that is) only on the road. Did I hear it from friends and family? Yes! I still do but they are not responsible for my destiny. I am. I only went on social media for work-related things and then I was off. I started using that good old Audible app that I was paying for each month and accruing credits that I wasn't using. Well, I found some self-development stuff on it and got my entire life! I would turn it on when I was in the shower each night or early in the morning when I was prepping. Oh and I started waking up at 4:30am so that I could do all of "my stuff" (i.e. quiet time, filming, workout, website, creating, prepping, you name it) before PoppiPudding (my baby) woke up since he was a late sleeper most mornings. I got more done in those 5 hrs toward my business and everything else than I was getting done all day previously and then I found more opportunities throughout my day to get things done while still tending to my baby and husband when he got off. I was waaaaaay less frustrated throughout my day, tired from doing the right things and not just "busy" stuff, but most of all, I was fulfilled and at peace when I laid my head down each night.
Your Turn
What could you do differently this year to ensure that you don't get caught up in busy-ness of everything and everybody around you and not handling real business? Busy-ness should not be your goal because there's not long term benefits in it. What we need to do is get rid of the distractions, FEAR being one of them, and jump. Better yet, DIVE into your goals and purpose! Cut off that t.v. and read a book, listen to a book, exercise, research your goal, etc. There's so many steps you could take to ensure you don't do what you did last year and the year before. It will take stubborn determination but you WILL see the results of it, little by little. So, today evaluate yourself and see what you are doing or not doing. See what you need to cut out and who you need to cut off completely. It may be a boyfriend, friend, or family member. (I highly believe in taking breaks from people. I have NEVER regretted it either.)
Do you and don't look back. It's now or never.
In the meantime, enjoy your week and you're already absolutely AMAZING!
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